


You Forfeit All Rights To My Heart

by swaghetti



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Family Reunions, Friends to Lovers, Hamilton References, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-17
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-08 02:51:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14684925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swaghetti/pseuds/swaghetti
Summary: Nursey and Dex's friendly rivalry has turned into mutual affection for each other, not that any of them would tell each other that. Tensions arise from this, as the boys prepare for the big game, and for the arrival of Nursey's family. Lots of Hamilton references, for some reason.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [princesandpirates](https://archiveofourown.org/users/princesandpirates/gifts).



“How long does a pie have to cool before we can eat it,” Ransom whined, “It’s taunting me!” He dramatically reached towards the pie on the counter, despite being sprawled across a couch a yard away from it.   


“You don’t have to wait. You can eat it now, as long as you’re cool with burning your tongue,” Bitty said, smiling sweetly.   


Ransom groaned and slumped further down the couch, kicking Holster in the face in the process. Dex rolled his eyes and tried to focus on his homework, but he was clearly also really craving that pie.   


At that moment Nursey pushed open the front door. “I got big news you guys!” He declared. “Is that pie? Of course it’s pie- it’s always pie. Anyways, big news!”   


Dex not so reluctantly put down his homework. “Are you gonna tell us or…?”   


“I don’t know, not everyone’s here. But you know what, fuck it! I just got off the phone with my moms, and they said they’re coming to see our next hockey game,” Nursey explained.   


“That’s your big news?” Dex asked.    


“First of all: fuck you. Second of all: fuck off. Third of all: My moms have never come to see any of my games so yeah it sort of is but actually, fourth of all: I wasn’t finished,” Nursey said.   


Dex rolled his eyes but felt kind of bad. His parents had come to most of his games. “Do go on,” Dex insisted.   


Nursey sat himself down on the armchair next to Dex. “Alright, well it’s not just them coming. They’re bringing like, legit, my entire extended family. I’m talking grandmas! Grandpas! Aunts! Uncles! The whole deal.” He slapped his leg for emphasis after every family member. “And, they all want to meet the team.”   


“Just out of curiosity—How many people would that be?” Bitty asked.   


“ Like...” Nursey counted on his fingers, “Eight total. They’re all getting hotel rooms. If you’re asking for pie reasons, I will hug you five million times.”   


“Speaking of pie! Is it cooled yet?” Ransom chirped.   


“Knock yourself out,” Bitty said.   


Ransom and Holster both ran to get some; Bitty smiled at how much his work was appreciated.   


“Just like, make sure we win this game,” Nursey said, not moving from his seat. “I don’t wanna lose in front of Nana Ethel.”   


“We weren’t planning on losing,” Holster assured him through a mouthful of pie.   


“Ooh, Jack and Shitty are coming to this game! They’ll get to meet your family too! Oh boy, I’m gonna have to make a lot of pies…” Bitty remarked.   


“Honestly Bitty, you’re the best,” Nursey said.   


Dex got up to get a slice of pie and brought one back for Nursey as well.   


“Woah, thanks dude!” Nursey exclaimed.   


“Yeah no problem,” Dex said as he sat down. He contemplated saying it’s chill for a laugh but decided he’d probably get chirped for it. “Your family isn’t gonna be all snobby and  judgemental and like, hate me because I used the wrong fork for my salad are they?”   


“Are you kidding me Dex? My family is the absolute chillest. Fuck you. Anyways, I love you, so I’m sure they will too,” Nursey promised him, reaching over and ruffling Dex’s hair.   


Dex went still, a half-chewed piece of pie still sitting in his mouth. It was as if the world stopped spinning, or maybe started spinning faster. He could feel his cheeks burning and forced himself to swallow the pie. “I gotta, I gotta go um, I’m gonna go use the restroom,” he proclaimed at what wasn’t a yell but definitely wasn’t normal speaking levels.   


“Thanks for the announcement bro,” Ransom teased as Dex ran off.   


Dex locked the restroom door and put gripped the counter, breathing heavily. He was so obvious, was there a single person in that room who didn’t register his reaction? So much for being discreet.   


His entire life right now could be summed up by the word why. Why did he and Nursey have to stop fighting? Why did he and Nursey have to comfort each other after losses and celebrate together after wins? Why did they have to start sitting next to each other on roadies? Why did Dex have to look at Nursey’s smile and feel something more than friendship? Why did he have to feel like he’d been stabbed whenever someone flirted with Nursey? Why did he have to stay up late fantasizing about impossible things? Why did he have to hear the joking words I love you and wish that Nursey meant it?   


Dex was increasingly aware of how his hair was ruffled. He washed his face with cold water and flushed the toilet in order to maintain the facade. When he finally came back Nursey had left and his pie had gotten cold.   



	2. Chapter Two

Nursey groaned into his pillow. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. He rolled over and was suddenly filled a swell of rage. He wasn’t the idiot, Dex was just an asshole. He should’ve been able to get away with a casual display of affection, it wasn’t as if Ransom and Holster didn’t declare their love for eachother every day. Nursey hadn’t done anything to imply that he meant more by it. To be fair, he did mean more by it, but he didn’t do anything to show that. It slipped out so easily, it was as natural to Nursey as breathing, because he did love Dex. 

It was odd, because there was a time when a simple interaction with Dex would put him in a furious frenzy, he’d write journal entries about how frustrated he was with him. Which, in retrospect, should’ve told him something- because a lot of people bothered him, but not this much, so it must have been true that whatever he felt for Dex, positive or negative, would always be intense.

He couldn’t quite put his finger on when the emotions shifted, just as intense, from hate to love, but he remembered when he realised it had. He just remembered one day when Dex was sick and missed practice and he had thought to himself Man, I wish Dex was here with the same intensity he used to wish that Dex would disappear with. He remembered visiting Dex’s dorm that day and thinking that even when sick with the flu, Dex still looked adorable. He remembered the first time he wrote a sappy poem about Dex, writing about the galaxies in his eyes, and knowing he was screwed.

He now felt anger towards Dex with the same intensity his longing for him had been. Who did he think he was? Why was the thought of Nursey loving him revolting enough to turn his face the color of his hair? Nursey wanted to scream, to punch Dex in the face, but he mostly wanted to hold Dex in his arms and cry.

His hands tingled where they had recently caressed Dex’s soft hair. He would have to drop a casual I love this team at the next practice, show Dex that what he said didn’t mean anything. Nursey’s stomach churned at the idea, why did it have to mean nothing? Why was Dex such an asshole? Why was he so obsessed with himself that he saw Nursey’s statement as something predatory, rather than affection for someone who had become like his family?

Although he knew that all of his team-mates had become his family, what he felt for Dex was something more. Which was so incredibly stupid, because he and Dex had never even been a thing, and this moment still hurt on the same level as when his boyfriend for three years had dumped him. Everything had to be so extreme with Dex, he was the opposite of chill.

He had planned on staying at the haus longer, but after Dex excused himself he realized that he didn’t want to face him when he returned. So Nursey left saying he had homework, even though he had come to the Haus with the intention of doing his homework there, on an armchair next to Dex while he devoured Bitty’s pie.

He felt ridiculous, laying on top of his dorm room bed moping. He didn’t think Dex would bring it up again, but he might act awkward around him for a few days. So help him if it messed with the game… Nursey refused to lose in front of his family. It was quite stressful that they would be coming, although he appreciated the support.

Nursey decided that he should start on his homework, rather than sulk all day. Dex wasn’t about to ruin his academic life. Nursey emptied his backpack onto his desk, and pushed aside the notebook where poetry about Dex’s smile were engraved.

His assignment was just reading, and no notes were required but he knew that if he didn’t take any he would regret it later. It wasn’t a class he cared about, he was just taking it for the credit, so he detested the idea of doing work for it even more than he usually detested doing homework. 

It took him longer than it normally would because there was so much on his mind, quite a few times he’d had to reread a page because he hadn’t actually ingested any of the words on it. He wasn’t a quitter, so a stressful hour and a half later he had completed his task at a semi-decent level. 

He started cleaning up and realized that his poetry notebook had fallen to the floor opened. He picked it up and carefully un-creased the pages that had gotten folded in the fall. He caught a glimpse of a phrase, his presence is like peace, and quickly shut it. He considered writing a poem about what he felt like, venting his feelings to a quiet but patient audience. He decided against it, what he was feeling wasn’t something he wanted immortalized.


	3. Chapter 3

“No,  _ you  _ hang up first!” Chowder teased Farmer over the phone. He was smiling obnoxiously, a glint in his eyes.

Dex hated himself for feeling scorn at his friend’s happiness. He stared at his feet as they walked, hoping Chowder wouldn’t be able to read it in his face. Dex didn’t long for affection or intimacy often, but Nursey had caused a rare occurrence. He imagined himself in a long established relationship with Nursey, dropping  _ I love you _ ’s everyday and meaning them every time. 

Dex had never been in a long term relationship, and his short term ones were few. 

Three, to be exact. 

His siblings knew he was bisexual. They were the first to find out, and were so supportive and understanding he almost cried of relief. He told his parents some time later and they… well, their opinion of Dex hadn’t changed at all, they still loved him, but mostly because they weren’t acknowledging his confession. One time, his dad remarked, “If you like both girls and guys, just… don’t ever marry a guy. It’s easier for everyone that way.” (an event that made Dex excuse himself to go scream in a pillow).

He had considered coming out to his teammates many times before, but he could never get the words out. It hurt sometimes -- it hurt a lot of the time -- but he dealed.

Farmer and Chowder had finally come to the revolutionary decision that they would both hang up at the same time, and Dex swallowed down his jealousy as he listened to Chowder’s smitten chatter.

“I know, I know I keep talking about her but she’s just so great! And I asked Nursey if I could bring her when we met all his relatives and he was all like ‘Sure bro’ and now I’m so excited because we’ve decided to wear,  _ get this _ , matching outfits! And I know you guys are gonna chirp me for it but we’re gonna look cute as hell, so… And I -- oh man, I’m sorry! I keep going on and on, but like you’ll understand when you start dating someone -- which reminds me! Are you thinking of dating someone? Because Farmer has a newly single friend and we had the best idea! Double Dates!” Chowder rambled with varying degrees of excitement, all of which made his voice really high.

“I told you Chowder, I’m just not looking for a relationship right now. I just wanna focus on my studying,” Dex replied. Honestly, he couldn’t see anyone willingly wanting to be with him romantically. It just wasn’t a realistic possibility in his mind.

Chowder looked impressed.“Wow, you’re so dedicated Dex! I tried to give up netflix so I could focus on my studying, and it actually lasted for like a week, but then the new season of How to Get Away With Murder came out! And Ransom and Holster accidentally spoiled me on a bit of it so I  _ had  _ to watch it before  _ I  _ murdered, you know? I do know what you mean though, I got a C on a test last week because I stayed up late texting Farmer instead of studying.; I almost cried! I’m working on it though, we all make mistakes. Anyways, that’s really dedicated of you, but you gotta let me set you up during the break!”

Dex bit his lip. “We’ll see…”

They passed by a Starbucks and Chowder somehow got even more excited than he had been previously. “Ooh! Can we go get a Frappuccino?” He asked eagerly.

Dex glanced at all, “We have practice in fifteen minutes, and it will take some time for them to make it. You’ll probably vomit if you drink that right before practice.”

“That’s a risk I’m willing to take.” Chowder grabbed Dex’s hand and started dragging him through the Starbucks doors. Chowder looked up at the menu, “I got the s'mores last time, so I should probably get something else right? Although it might be leaving the menu soon and it was really good… What do you think?”

“I don’t care what you get as long as I don’t have to clean the vomit off the rink. Although personally I’d say that you can never go wrong with the Java Chip,” Dex said.

A voice spoke up from behind them in line. “I usually get the Vanilla Bean.”

They both turned around and Chowder exclaimed, “Nursey! I knew I wasn’t the only one craving a pre-practice frappe! Dex thinks it will make me vomit, but he underestimates me!”

Nursey smiled smugly, “Would it be wrong if Dex and I placed bets on whether or not you will hurl?”

Chowder nodded a bit overenthusiastically, “Go ahead! I know my limits.” At that point the barista was ready for him and he turned to order.

Nursey addressed Dex, “What will it be? Five dollars, you saying Chowder will hurl, me saying he won’t?”

Dex currently wanted to curl up into a fetal position, and whether or not Chowder vomited was the last thing on his mind. He hadn’t seen Nursey since he totally betrayed himself the day before, and was terrified of saying something stupid. Still, he was determined not to get flustered around him, “I don’t throw my money around like that, Nurse.”

“So you think you’ll lose?” Nursey smirked.

“Fuck you, ten dollars! And you have to clean it all up.”


	4. Chapter Four

Chowder did not throw up. Nursey had forgotten about the bet as they practiced, he was impossibly going at it even harder than before, fueled by the knowledge that his family would be there. He only recalled the wager when they entered the locker room and Chowder removed his helmet, gleefully shouting, “I told you so Dex! Hand Nursey your money!”

“What?” Dex asked, seeming dazed. He had been off at practice today, missing all the passes Nursey aimed at him. Nursey hoped he wouldn’t be so distracted the game tomorrow, but he understood that everyone had off days. “Oh, right. Damn it! How could you possibly keep down that venti cup of sugar and caffeine?”

Bitty piped up from the other side of the locker room,“I’m sorry, what’s happening?” 

“Dex bet Nursey money that I would throw up at practice today. ‘Cause I had a sw’awesome frappuccino right before,” Chowder explained.

“Why would you bet money on that?” Bitty asked, “Who do you know that throws up that easily?”

“I throw up that easily!” Dex yelped indignantly, “Do the rest of you guys have stomachs of steel or something? I never eat within two hours of a practice or three hours of a game.”

“You’re just weak,” Nursey said as he removed his shirt, “And now you will pay the price.” He held out his hand.

Dex looked flushed and averted his eyes from Nursey’s bare torso. Slightly flustered, he replied, “The poor giving to the rich. This is such a metaphor for capitalism. I don’t even have ten dollars.”

“Don’t try to get out of this,” Chowder said, “I saw you put your wallet in your backpack.”

Nursey wasn’t listening to this, he was still processing and being hurt by Dex’s reaction to his undressing. He had been in a locker room with Dex multiple times before, Dex never behaved like that. He didn’t think anyone else noticed, but that was hard to miss. He seemed embarrassed, Nursey thought. He remembered when he came out to his teammates back at Andover, they had suddenly become uncomfortable in the locker room. Did this have to do with what he told Dex yesterday? Don’t acknowledge it. Don’t start a fight. 

When the team exited the locker room Dex handed him a crisp ten dollar bill, and Nursey had to suppress both the anger he was feeling and the urge to make a Hamilton joke when he accepted it.

“Enjoy your money, you thief,” Dex said in what vaguely resembled a joking manner. Dex wasn’t meeting Nursey’s eyes.

“Alexander Hamilton… His name was Alexander Hamilton…” Nursey sang. Okay, so he didn’t suppress that urge. But he managed to hide his offense over Dex’s locker room conduct.

Dex smiled, a nervous smile, and finally managed make eye contact with Nursey. Nursey couldn’t believe it. This was his friend! One short sentence and now Dex was behaving awkwardly around him. He’d punch him, but he also had no desire to hurt Dex, and he was sure Dex’s retaliation would be intense, like everything about him.

“Buy yourself something pretty,” Dex teased him, and his voice now resembled his normal attitude slightly more.

“Well, since I haven’t had it ruined for me by seeing Chowder regurgitate some of it, I’m thinking of a frappuccino,” Nursey said.

“You had starbucks right before practice!” Dex objected.

“That was a coffee. I didn’t have a frappe because of your inaccurate prophecy,” Nursey explained. This was good. This was easy banter. He could swallow his anger, he could let it disappear. They could move past this. Of course, he was pissed that Dex would be like that in the first place, but he learned long ago that people disappointed you from time to time.

Dex dramatically shook his head, “The lavishness of the wealthy. The waste. My mama always warned me not to gamble.”

“I just realized though, I think we passed the starbucks a while back,” Nursey observed.

Dex looked behind him as they walked, “Oh yeah, I think you’re right.”

“Foiled again!” Nursey yelled and Dex laughed. That’s a genuine laugh, Nursey thought. He’s not faking that. 

As they neared the dorms, Nursey heard Dex’s stomach growl and remembered his previous remark. “Do you really not eat within two hours of practice?” He inquired.

Dex fidgeted slightly and answered, “Well, yeah… I get queasy when I play, and usually can’t hold down food. I realized back with my old team. I had assumed most people were like that.”

“Well hey, everyone’s different. Too bad it cost you money,” Nursey chirped.

Dex sighed, “Whatever.”

“Do you have food back in your dorm?” Nursey asked.

“I was just gonna get something from the vending machines,” Dex said. He was more relaxed now than when they started their walk, much to Nursey’s relief.

“Well that’s not nutritional! Let me buy you a sandwich from the cafeteria,” Nursey offered.

“How generous, you’ll pay with my money,” Dex rolled his eyes. “I appreciate it, but I don’t need charity.”

Dex was always so stubborn. Well, two could play at that game. “Come on!” Nursey insisted. “I’m hungry too, and I don’t want to be alone at the cafeteria.”

“Dinner’s in an hour!” Dex exclaimed. “You eat so much! How the fuck do you still have a six pack?” He blurted out. 

“I didn’t think you noticed,” Nursey smirked and Dex’s cheeks rapidly changed color. 

Dex didn’t speak after that remark, so Nursey used the opportunity to grab his arm and drag him towards the cafeteria.


	5. Chapter Five

Having a crush on someone is possibly the worst decision anyone can ever make. Dex worked hard to always have control of himself, excluding his slight anger problems, and Nursey was making it all crumble apart. At practice he was thinking so hard about how he needed to do well so that Nursey wouldn’t get to him, that he got distracted and missed Nursey’s pass. He was then so embarrassed that he got distracted thinking about how embarrassed he was and fucked up even more.

His preferred solution to this situation was to make as little contact with Nursey as possible, but he was currently being whisked away by Nursey for what was probably gonna be a long one on one meal. 

“Come on dude, you don’t have to grip me so hard!” Dex protested as Nursey pulled him along.

“My bad!” Nursey apologised and loosened his grip.

“I’m not letting you pay for my food,” Dex said as they entered the cafeteria.

“Whatever, your loss.” 

Dex wondered who gave Nursey the right to be so casually beautiful. He was sporting a grey beanie like some kind of hipster, a few chocolate curls managed to escape and nestle against his forehead. He was also wearing an oversized black sweater, which didn’t even make sense, how does a huge hockey player manage to find an oversized sweater? To complete the look were blue denim skinny jeans, and oh boy did Dex have some feelings about those. 

Dex was praying to every conceived deity that he hadn’t betrayed himself, though he feared that with staring at Nursey’s six pack and then further mentioning Nursey’s six pack, there was really no use.

Dex realised that he had once again gotten distracted and was now sitting on a cafeteria table with Nursey, holding a turkey wrap that he didn’t remember ordering. “Did you pay for my meal?” Dex asked accusingly.

“Yes I did. I’m a horrible monster,” Nursey replied.

Dex rolled his eyes, “Sorry I zoned out on you back there.”

“It’s cool.”

Had Nursey noticed Dex’s helplessness? Oh god, that reminded him of that Hamilton song. The whole Haus had become obsessed; they never shut up about Hamilton.

“Yo, earth to Dex.”

Dex blinked to see Nursey snapping his fingers in his face. “Hey, knock it off.”

Nursey withdrew his arm, “Sorry, you just kinda spaced out again.”

“Oh shit, for how long?” Dex asked, ready to literally descend into hell.

“You stared at the wrap for like a solid two minutes. At first I was like, okay, it’s an interesting wrap. But then I got concerned you were having a mini seizure or something,” Nursey explained.

Dex hadn’t blanked like that for a long time, how did Nursey have such a hold on him? He put his head in his hands. “I’m so sorry. I know I’ve been acting really weird lately. I just have a lot of shit on my mind.” Dex hoped that this excuse would make it seem like he had something else going on besides a ridiculous infatuation with Nursey, maybe he’d disregard all of Dex’s previous stupidness.

Nursey looked worried, but there was something else lurking in his eyes. It seemed like… relief? He put down his half eaten sandwich and out his hands out as if for Dex to hold. “Do you want to talk about it?”

He was so innocently concerned, Dex looked at his outstretched hand and felt a million dreams and impossibilities forming in his mind, threatening to manifest themselves as tears. He swallowed and tried to work up the courage to grasp Nursey’s hands. Instead he just shifted his gaze towards the table and mumbled, “It’s fine.”

Nursey’s arms retreated and Dex glanced a bit of hurt in his expression out of his peripheral vision. Dex managed to look up but not directly at him and say, “But um, thank you for caring. That means a lot to me.”

“Yeah, no problem. You know that I lo-”

Dex’s breath caught at the sound of Nursey almost repeating those forbidden words.

“I mean, you’re my teammate. And I love this team you know. You and Chowder, and Bitty, and- you know. All of you guys. You’re like my family,” Nursey rambled.

Dex’s appetite for his turkey wrap grew less and less as Nursey spoke, despite his hunger. It was better, he knew, for Nursey to clarify that his love didn’t mean much. He obviously sensed Dex’s absurd wish and didn’t want to lead him on. Better to dull it before Dex’s mind once again travelled to lovely places where him and Nursey were grossly domestic and happy.

“But hey,” Nursey continued, “Tomorrow you’ll meet my real family! I mean, obviously you guys are real but like, you know what I mean.”

Dex’s turkey wrap was becoming a terrifying figure to him, to somehow swallow a bite of it would be an incredible feat. He peeled back some of the tinfoil around it as if he thought he could really eat it.

“Aren’t you gonna eat that?” Nursey asked.

Dex wasn’t sure he could speak right now. Nursey was looking at him with his stupid eyes and his fake love and the turkey wrap was sitting in his hand menacingly, daring him to try and appease his hunger. He slowly lifted it to his mouth and took a bite. It took him an awful long time to chew it. Finally he swallowed and before it threatened to come back up stammered, “I have a lot of homework so uh, I’m gonna head back and get it done. Thanks though. You know, for the food.”


End file.
